My First Time

Yep, it finally happened. I finally got pulled over for speeding. Okay, so here's what happened. I was driving home from work and when you pull out of our parking lot, the speed limit is 45 mph until you pass the 4-way stop where it turns 35. Well, I got behind an older gentleman who was weaving in and out of the lanes, driving down the middle of the road, and going 30 mph. So, needless to say, a bit frustrating. After we passed the 4-way stop I thought to myself, "I gotta get around this guy." so I get into the right lane to pass him and I speed up to go around him. Just when I do, that's when I got caught. As I passed the car I thought, "Did I just see another white car out of the corner of my eye?" and then I looked in my rearview mirror and saw him pull out. Of course I slowed down immediately and thought to myself, "Please don't let it be me, please don't let it be me." and the cop was behind another car so I thought, "Good, maybe he won't get me....maybe I'll turn!" but then the car behind me turned and the cop pulled right up on my tail. So I pulled over into the Lotta Burger parking lot and did everything I was supposed to do. I turned off the radio, got my insurance stuff out of the glove compartment and got my license out and then shut off the car. Then I remembered, "OH CRAP! MY LICENSE IS EXPIRED!!!" so I grab my cell phone to call my husband and ask him what I should say. So, I dialed and then noticed the cop was right by the car, so I sat the phone in my lap. I see that it's a black guy so I say in my head, "Please be Monte or Nathan, please be Monte or Nathan, please be Monte or Nathan!" because I know a couple of black cops. IT WAS MONTE! He used to come into the Y all the time! He's awesome! So, I look and say, "Hey Monte!" with a huge smile on my face and he says, "Sweetie, whachu doin' speedin', girl you need to slow your butt down!" and then I hand him my stuff and he says, "This is outta date." and my heart sinks, but then I noticed he was talking about my insurance. I had the old one on top so then he says, "Oh yeah, this is the current one here, you need to put this other one away." Then he looks at my license for a really long time and says, "I'm gonna take this and I'll be right back, I clocked you goin' 44 in a 35 girl!" and he walks off. Then I pick up my phone and it says, "End" so I push it and call Justin back. He had heard the whole thing. He said to play dumb about the license being expired if he mentioned it because I totally knew and just that weekend we were going to go to the tag agency and get it renewed but they closed early. So, he comes back and I get off the phone with Justin. So Monte says to me, "Girl, your license is expired, you need to get that renewed!" and I'm like, "Oh wow!" like I was surprised or something. He said, "You better watch it out here 'cause some of these guys ain't so nice. If you would have been somebody else I woulda wrote ya up! But I'm glad it was you so I could tell you about your license!" and I'm like, "Well, I'm glad it was you!" Then he said, "I'm just gonna write you a warning and tell you that you need to slow your butt down!" so he wrote out the thing and handed it to me, and I said, "Thank you sir." and he said, "Pssht, you don't got to call me sir!" and left! :):):):):)

Now here's the funny part. When I got home, Justin wasn't mad at all, but it's what he THOUGHT was happening that is so funny. I didn't realize that I hit "Call" when I called him so I didn't know that he was hearing the whole thing. But what he thought when he heard Monte's voice and heard him call me "Sweetie" is that I was with some other guy and flirting or something!!! Hahahahahahahaha! Justin was like, "Oh heck no!" "NO she isn't!" but then he was glad 'cause he thought my phone had accidentally called him in the middle of my cheating on him or whatever and he actually thought, "HA! I've caught her! Thank you God!" but then he heard Monte say, "I got you going 44 in a 35" or whatever so then he knew. Isn't that hilarious?? I was like, "Justin, I can't believe you thought that's what was going on. What if I was actually getting kidnapped by some weirdo trying to sweet-talk me and I was trying to let you know." but anyways, all was well and cool. So right before dinner Justin was like, "Do you want to pray?" and he was like, "I think you need to thank God for the mercy He showed you today." so yeah, I was totally thankful and now I drive like 40 in 45mph zones. It was a good wake-up call for my lead foot. L8!